preocupations with love, life and rotine

I guess one of the hardest things to fight back is routine. Falling into a monotonous set of behaviors that actually helps us survive the unsettling constantly changing world.
But routine is no help for romance, for love life. It hurts it, and that worries me. Many things worry me though... I am a bit of a worry freak. I think about all the possible things that can go wrong and blame myself when they do. I guess tonight, as my body hurts my soul decided to join it. A cloud of thoughts knocks in my mind and my preoccupation with routine and the lack of romance hits me like a wave of emotions I really don't need, so I've been pushing down creating heavier waves. Tonight all I can think about is the difference between the beginning of a romantic relationship and the middle or so of it. How in the beginning nothing is more important than the other one, than satisfying the other part, showing them how much and how far, how real what we feels is. They come first and we show that, from the most simple attitudes to the most elaborate. Time goes by and life takes over, priorities change? Now everything else, work, the kids, the football games, the videogames, and so on... all these things somehow (and I really don't know how) somehow becomes more essential more immediately important. It is never just one parts fault, that I don't believe to be true, we all know relationships take two, two individuals "hard" work. I guess the line that defines how much "hard" work we need to put in, or how much "hard" work we feel we need to put in, i guess this line is damn hard to define.

Cycle of life

The complicated sentiment that you losing grip of the strings you held on to, so tightly.

Probably my sign of lack of maturity, trying so hard to hold on to a feeling of belonging, friendships in which so much seemed to be invested, a time a state of mind a frame of happiness, that's blown away... right in front me.

Perfect ending to the day

Close to the sea, the smell of freshness in the air. Bubbles flying in the windy night. The Moon, nearly totally full, shining bright on the water. The perfect sound to entertain the crowd, awaiting the finishing act. Fireworks. Colour, rythm and happy tears.

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=11c0aZQhn6M)

- Times when I feel so satisfied to be living. -

the ability to grow

Today, when I think about my past, i will a bit sad. Which actually reinforces the feeling. I just think to myself, i really hope i did the best or was the best i could have been at that time and place in my life. I hope my mistakes have shaped the person I am, the person I want to be.

Beautiful moments

The simplicity of chasing a ball...

What happens when you momentarily realize
you don’t feel close to the group of friends around you?

Really caring...

Sometimes I do ask myself if I really do care, if I care as much as I would like to say I do. Do I care enough to listen, to truly ask and process all the information I receive in reply?

I want to be someone who cares, who takes some time.

I wonder.

Is it that there is less need to care, care truly about others, about our family, about our friends? Are we just that little bit more self-centered? Or are we just loosing touch with what it means to care, to want to know, to be concerned, to ask questions and listen?

[the irony in stating online socially that something is not right and getting a "you can do it" "be strong" "hang in there" "tomorrow it will be better" reply!
... funny, would it not make a bit more sense to ask what is wrong, to talk, to show some genuine concern?]

I wonder.

Could we be loosing touch when it concerns emotional intelligence?

... Probably not. I'm probably just going through a more emotional phase...